A collection of experimental jokes
Jokes
| Joke | Type/Notes |
|---|---|
| ✨Failure builds character✨, and the characters built different probably failed a lot 🤔 | Idiom literalization, wordplay, anti-proverb, meme |
| I thought I had imposter’s syndrome, but it looks like that was never the truth and that I was just pretending. I’m such a fraud. | Ironic, self-referential |
| I fell in some muddy grass. Thank you mother nature for that gracias | Bilingual pun, groaner |
| Give a man a fish, and he’ll be fed for a day 🙂↕️ Teach a man 👨🏻 how to fish 🎣…and unless he has a seafood allergy 🐟😵, he’ll feed himself 😀 Teach a man how to teach himself how to fish 🧠, and he’ll be nourished and content for life 😊 Teach a man how to teach others to fish 👨🏻🏫🎣🙇🏼♀️, and he’ll become a valued, productive member of society 😮 Teach a man how to teach others to teach themselves how to fish 🙇🏼♀️🎣🙇🏼♀️🙇🏼♀️🙇🏼♀️, and the very cohesive social fabric built upon information-exchanging interactions between wise fellows and naive mellows will dissipate into oblivion 😭😭😭 Teach a fish to man up 💪🐟, and the man will starve to death 🗿 | Idiom extension, recursive humor, absurd escalation, idiom literalization |
| The deliverer-liver deliverer delivers the livers of the deliverers. The deliverer-liver deliverer’s killer, the killerer of the deliverers, lives by the river. ”I deliver the livers of the killers’ livers” the deliverer delivers. ”I kill ‘er; the deliverers’ killer” the deliverer-liver deliverer’s killer lividly delivers vividly. | Tongue twister, phonetic wordplay, absurd/dark imagery |
| I knew a vegan once…very ethically sourced. | Dark absurd |
| I drop bars so dope You drop bars of soap | Roast, pun, rhyming |
| What do you call a try-hard military official, segfaulting OS, a trivially factorable function, a syntactically broken sentence, and a stunted seed? A degenerate kernel | Pun, cross-domain (5), turbo nerd humor |
| The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The optimist sees the glass as half full. The realist sees the glass as half full of water and half full of air. The physicist sees the glass as mostly empty. The quantum physicist sees the glass as full of quantum fluctuations. The chemist sees the glass as 7 moles of and 30 mmol of , 60 mmol of , and 1 mmol of and other gases. The biologist sees the glass as full of microbial breeding potential. The nutritionist recommends you drink 8 of these a day. The capitalist tries to sell the glass to the nutritionist. The anarchist drinks the glass and disputes the concept of ownership with the capitalist. The cop tells the anarchist to put down the remaining glass shards. The blind man doesn’t see the glass, but hears the commotion. The deaf man sees the glass but doesn’t hear the commotion. The solipsist sees and hears the glass and the commotion but does not any of them exist. The rationalist sees the shards and proves that the glass is no longer intact. The Bayesian updates his prior against leaving philosophers near drinkware. The linguist points out that everyone keeps saying “glass” even though it is now technically a puddle and several shards. The absurdist laughs at the commotion and asks for another glass. The postmodernist questions whether “full” and “empty” were just binaries imposed by Big Cup. The meta-philosopher asks whether you’re half done with this format yet. | Absurd escalation, nerd humor, meta humor, satire |
| A: The more you know, the less you know B: You must be a genius then | Roast |
| Tongue’s so sharp I slice enemies with words so curt Tongue’s so sharp that tongue-in-cheek jokes hurt ouch! | Metaphor literalization, idiom literalization, rhyming, wordplay |
| A picture is worth a thousand words. A video is a thousand pictures. A movie is a long video. The book is better than the movie. And you learn more from doing than reading. So actions speak volumes Yet here I am, using words to explain why they’re inferior. | Meta humor, aphorism chaining, parody reasoning |
| A: People either think in binaries or they don’t. B: I disagree. Mostly. | Premise-breaking |
Half-baked phrases
| Entry | Context |
|---|---|
| Tar Bomba | Tar bombs are files that when unzipped, dump a lot of files in the current working directory. The Tsar Bomba is the largest bomb detonated in history |
| Don’t gripe it till you wipe it | Toilet paper |
| No brisket, don’t risk it | Burritos |
| I think, therefore I am. I overthink, therefore…am I? | De Carte |
| Dynasty’s die nasty | Usually they do |
| A chase worth dreaming is a dream worth chasing |